what fresh hell is this?

Some bishops apparently think that a priest paying a teenage boy for sex isn't serious, as long as the boy is not a parishioner.

I am just dying to read the depo transcript on this one, of which the Associated Press scored a copy, but I haven't found a website yet with the materials in full. The Globe's too busy now, I suppose.

happy to be proven wrong

It looks like the RCAB (Roman Catholic Archbishop of Boston to the uninitiated) did not file for bankruptcy today after all. God bless us, everyone.

a kinder, gentler goddess

The headers in all caps were starting to remind me too much of the briefs I write, six at last count this week alone. Bah, humbug. So I have decreed a style change.

I've also just signed up to get email Boston Globe headlines every morning. Their coverage really can't be beat.

It's really a pity that the Boston Herald isn't a little more web-savvy. In order to get its headlines mailed to me, I have to become a "subscriber," that is, it appears, pay money. I suppose they made a business decision not to set up a competing portal site to the Globe's fabulous abuse portal (I can't believe I just used that adjective to modify that noun), which I have praised before. But it's unfortunate that almost nobody has picked up on the Herald's three month's of sifting through records to cull out the current real estate holdings of the Roman Catholic Archbishop Of Boston, A Corporation Sole (not Law now, but the new guy, Peace Be Unto Him). So I'll publicize it again, and maybe my six readers will spread the message, just like the Alice's Restaurant Anti-Massacre Movement.

vow of poverty? i don't think so!

Nate Oman blogged recently, in response to my comments on Cardinal Law's mortgage, that my suspicions about bankruptcy were probably unfounded because of the priestly requirement of a vow of poverty, and that Cardinal Law probably didn't own any property of the archdiocese.

Interesting observation, but not entirely correct on either count. Not all priests take vows of poverty; only "religious" priests, as opposed to "diocesan" ones, do. I do not believe that Cardinal law is a "religious" priest, that is, a member of a religious order, judging by this biography/obituary-in-a-can that the Boston Globe lifted from the New York TImes (with proper attribution, of course). Furthermore, there is an entire chapter of canon law devoted to "religious raised to the episcopacy" which basically says that he could wiggle out of former obligations "that he prudently judges are not compatible with his condition." And under Massacusetts law, The Roman Catholic Archbishop of Boston basically owns the entire archdiocese as a corporation sole, one of those marvelously arcane legal entities they certainly didn't teach me about in law school. As an entity it appears to be much beloved of earnest but indiscriminate laypeople.

But that got me wondering--how much information about the Archdiocese of Boston's finances, and the assets held by the Roman Catholic Archbishop of Boston, A Corporation Sole, can be sussed out by one researcher in Seattle, even if she is a Dark Goddess of research as well as replevin? Well, here's another suggestion that under civil law the cardinal owns at least the real estate of the archdiocese personally. And it looks like a great deal of the legwork on this one has already been done by the Boston Herald. And here's an oddity--the most detailed description of the Herald article, which is not easily accessible on line, though there seems to be a reprint here--appears in the Pilot, the Archdiocese of Boston's newspaper. Somehow I don't think there's full financial disclosure on the Archdiocese's website.

Stay tuned.

expected or intended?

On the one hand, it's great that Goodwin Proctor LLP has reviewed the insurance coverage of the Archdiocese of Boston and determined that it has at least ninety mil in coverage.

On the other hand, in another lifetime I used to do coverage litigation for polluters ::cough:: policyholders.

Now, I have not read these policies, but there's usually an exclusion when the policyholder is reckless or otherwise substantially at fault in the events that are occurring. The documents that are now being released are so bad that they may impair the possibililty of coverage. And as I understand it, Goodwin Proctor has just reviewed the policies, not all the evidence of Law, et alia, in their management of rogue priests.

a modest proposal

Most lawyers who have been using email for a while cherish the virtual legal communities that legal listservs cultivate.

These communities should be protected from the terminally stupid.

Therefore, I propose that legal listserve participation be limited to those who can demonstrate a minimum required level of intellligence.

Specifically, any lawyer who uses an out-of-the-office autorespond message to reply to mailing list messages should not be allowed to post to a list. I even question whether they should be trusted with a computer.

update 1-15-2003

It is not true that I have made serious death threats against lawyers who misuse their autoresponders in this fashion. It was a joke, I swear it.

how appalling

In all the furor about the Archdiocese of Boston threatening to file for bankruptcy, there's a piece that's been missing from the discussion.

Back on September 27, 2002, Cardinal Law mortgaged his house to pay off the Archdiocese's line of credit.

Why am I in a lather about this? Well, it smacks of bankruptcy planning to me. A person can exempt from distribution to creditors in a bankruptcy generally only a limited amout of home equity (except in bankruptcy havens like Texas and Florida, where one has an unlimited exemption). So usually, if you have a valuable house, you have to give it up to your creditors to pay your debts. But if you take out a mortgage on the house before your bankruptcy to extract and use up the equity, say by paying current operating expenses for an archdiocese (there's a preference issue if you retire old debts with the money, or make payments within 90 days of the bankruptcy), you get to keep your mortgaged house, 'cause there's no equity. And as debtor-in-possession you get to make your big mortgage payments.

Are you thinking, who lends money to institutions on the brink of bankruptcy? Well, if you're a Catholic archdiocese, the answer to that question is the Knights of Columbus. The Knights' website says that "For more than 100 years the Knights of Columbus has provided financing for church development projects. The loans are available to dioceses, parishes, catholic schools and hospitals or any other Catholic facility. Once a loan is approved it can be used to replace a bank construction loan. These loans not only offer attractive rates, but also feature maturities up to 20 years. There are no points and no hidden charges. You will need the following prior to the application process: approval and guarantee of the loan by your diocese or religious order and sufficient real estate so that the loan-to-value amount does not exceed 75%. The Knights will also consider unsecured loans."

Of course, all this assumes that Bernard Cardinal Law files for personal bankruptcy, and not the Archdiocese of Boston, but it is not clear to me yet--probably because I (1) haven't researched it; (2) am not hip to canon law--to what extent an archdiocese owns property separately from the cardinal, archibishop or other sentient mammal in leadership, and the effect of the corporation sole. My readership--at last count, six--is urged to check back as I research this further. Constance Sweeney--peace be unto her!!--appears to think that canon law is irrelevant when it comes to sheltering the AD.

What's the link to technology here? Well, back in the day when the Paula Jones complaint was passed around in xerox copy, which is how I read it months later, the information from which the reasonably informed can draw inferences is available much faster. And the truth--but what is truth?--must out all the faster.

So my hunch is that the thought of bankruptcy is NOT a new one for Cardinal Law...lessee...ninety days from 9/27/2002 is... 12/26/2002. Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night.

Do not go gentle.

how appealling

In some random googling this morning (for which I expect to receive a bill from myself for fifty bucks) I stumbled on a superlative blog on appellate matters across the country. Howard Bashman combines humor and heavy-duty substance in a manner that looks effortless, but I know it isn't, because I try.

I think that blogs will ultimately prove to be much more effective marketing devices for individual lawyers and their firms, in that order, than websites, at least for litigators and trial lawyers, because of their dynamic (in the literal sense) nature. One problem with hiring professional services is that it's hard to kick the tires, so to speak, of a lawyer. Their work is intangible. Websites are somewhat static, and the graphics are usually hired done and the content copywritten.

A blog, on the other hand, is real time, and so you can evaluate, at least in a limited sense, how the lawyer can actually respond to events as they evolve. And that's what you need to know when you're hiring a lawyer.

Signed,
The Goddess of Philosophy

i can't afford myself

It's a sobering thought.

Obviously, the time I spend blogging is time that I could, theoretically, be devoting to paying clients. So, for that matter, is time spent doing housework. I suppose I should say, theoretically doing housework. I long ago learned to rationalize not picking up the living room after the kids when I realized that I wouldn't pay someone $500 to do it, so why should I?

The extension of this thought is that I would be in a world of hurt financially if I started billing myself for the time spent generating this blog. Hey, stranger things have been done with billing in my day. For example, the classic "Programmable Elevator Messages--Why Bother?" of 10/8/2002 will cost me $675.

And you're reading it for free.

pacific third

It sounds like a B-movie title, but it's really a horrifying mark of the passage of time.

When I was in law school, diligently learning the rules of legal citation, life was simple. There were the Federal Reporters. The old cases were in the series abbeviated "F.," the new cases were abbreviated "F.2d."

Similar rules followed for the Pacific series of reporters.

I feel vaguely uneasy when I see cases cited as "__ F.3d ___" and "___ P.3d ___". When did a third series of both these reporters sneak up on me? At my back I always hear Time's winged chariot running near.

why you can't rely on the "word of the day" in elevators

You probably don't need me to tell you this, but the definitions are not very good.

Yesterday's Skyline Tower Word of the Day was "bell-wether," which the Oxford English Dictionary defines as:

1. The leading sheep of a flock, on whose neck a bell is hung.

c1440 Promp. Parv. 30/1 Belwedyr, shepe, titurus. 1549 Compl. Scot. vi. 66 The bel veddir for blythtnes bleyttit rycht fast. 1591 SPENSER M. Hubberd 296 To follow after their Belwether. 1718 MOTTEUX Quix. (1733) I. 237 He that steals a Bell-weather, shall be discover'd by the Bell. 1847 LEWES Hist. Philos. (1867) II. 254 Men are for the most part like sheep, who always follow the bell-wether.

2. fig. A chief or leader. (Mostly contemptuous.)

c1430 LYDG. Bochas (1554) 224a, I was cleped in my countrey The belweather. 1577 HOLINSHED Chron. II. 40/2 Thomas being the ring-leader of the one sect, and Scotus the belweadder of the other. 1687 T. BROWN Saints in Upr. Wks. 1730 I. 73 The principal bell-weathers of this mutiny. 1794 SOUTHEY Wat Tyler III. i. Wks. II. 50 You bell-wether of the mob. 1848 LOWELL Biglow P. i, 'Taint afollerin' your bell-wethers Will excuse ye in His sight.

3. fig. a. A clamorous person, one ready to give mouth. b. (Used opprobriously.)

c1460 Towneley Myst. 86 Go now, belleweder. 1598 SHAKES. Merry W. III. v. 111 To be detected with a iealious rotten Bell-weather. 1620 SHELTON Quix. IV. xiii. 109 She made me weep, that am no Bell-weather. 1847 HALLIWELL, Bell-wedder, a fretful child. North.

Hence bell-wethering, the fact of leading and being led ‘like sheep.’ bell-wetherishness, tendency to follow one who takes the lead.

1882 Spectator 25 Mar. 388 But for the bell-wethering, there could have been no crinoline at all. Ibid. 387 The gregariousness, and bell-wetherishness of the English people, who must all do the same thing at once.

The Skyline Tower English Dictionary defined bellwether as: "the leader of a group or movement." Well, yes, but, there's no nuance in that. On the other hand, the building is not tall enough to scroll the OED definition past the idle reader's eyes (are there any other kinds of readers of an elevator marquee?).

I should point out that the online OED is, in my opinion, one of the greatest hybrids of old and new technology birthed by the late twentieth century, compared to, say, the 1984 Compact Edition of the OED, which happens to be holding up my computer monitor even as I write. It is much easier to search online, and easier to search the updates.An annual subscription to the OED online costs US$ 550, but I have free, yes, free access to this marvel as a card-holder of the King County Library System, one of the great bargains of all time.

Oh, and the OED's Word of the Day (yes, they have one too, although if they're going to emulate the Skyline Tower they really should have the Muzak Annoying Tune of The Day) for Tuesday, October 22, 2002? Meridian quadrant. Take that, Skyline Tower!

jane's addiction

It started with Dope Wars. At first, I was obsessed. I burned through AAA batteries on my trusty IIIxe.

I was never comfortable with the idea of shooting cops, so I moved on to a clone called Solar Wars, a sanitized version of the same thing.

Eventually it started to seem a little too simple-minded, so I moved on to Space Trader, which has just been updated as of several days ago. This is an intricate strategy game that, when I am too tired to concentrate on law, I will play for hours and hours. Occasionally I will turn pirate, but I still can't bring myself to fire on the police ships.

When I'm too tired to play Space Trader, or when I'm in court, I will play Bejeweled. I have to turn the sound off in court. It's really quite beautiful on a color PDA. Then there's Glom, which is kind of a 21st century Tetris.

If you have no idea what this entry is about, count your lucky stars.

programmable elevator messages--why bother?

I found myself briefly today in the very fancy elevators of the very fancy Skyline Tower in Bellevue to drop in on a Very Fancy Law Firm, which shall remain nameless as it is guiltless in this episode.

While ascending, I happened to glance up at the elevator message line, which displays information like a stock ticker machine. Now, the stock ticker machine is an interesting piece of outmoded technology in and of itself, but what caught my eye is that this particular ticker was saying, "Glorify...Praise..." as my eye fell upon it.

For a giddy moment I thought that perhaps the elevator's microchips had a Goddess Detection Meter, then came to my senses and kept watching the ticker for the Rest of the Story, as Paul Harvey might abjure. The Skyline Tower ticker cycled around, mundanely enough, through the time and date (conveniently provided for those not already alert and oriented x 2) the outside temperature, and, strangely enough, the elevator's Word of the Day (I am not making this up): "exalt." Glorify and praise were simply part of the definition of exalt.

When I returned to the office, having made in my estimation enough money for the day, I began investigating the waste of technology that overly customizable elevator messages appear to constitute. What possible use is a "Word of the Day" in an elevator, unless it's something truly obscure, like usufructuary? Now that's a word.

I was interested to be informed that custom written messages are not ADA-compliant. Those bings that an elevator makes are called "floor passing tones" and are intended for the visually-impaired who cannot read the floor number display (which appeared in Skyline Tower directly above the customized ticker display). I wonder if the Very Fancy Law Firm knows (or cares) that its building is not ADA-compliant?

It turns out that providing supplementary elevator content is, unfortunately, a trend. In the vanguard of elevator information overload is an enterprising company in Westford, Massachusetts, that puts flat-screen monitors with local content in high rise elevators. This is going well beyond the ticker tape information I originally set forth to find.

By the way, I looked up Otis Elevator Co., expecting them to be a voice of reason, to discover that it is now a subsidiary of United Technologies, which seems to own every company that General Electric doesn't. Perhaps not coincidentally, Otis provided no information about elevator media. Are they lagging behind--or using technology sensibly?

report from the dark ages

Your Goddess is pleased to report that, after months of styling herself a "Goddess of Replevin" without any real credentials to back it up, she was actually able to obtain a Writ of Replevin in King County Superior Court.

She also needs to take a deep centering breath and stop referring to herself in the third person.

::coughs:: It should be clear to both my readers by now that I absolutely adore technology and what it can do for law.

There comes a time, however, when there is no substitute for having a guy with a big neck break a door down.

That's exactly what my newly-minted writ buys me, as long as a sheriff's indemnity bond is in place--which bond, the Court of Appeals has helpfully pointed out, is not waivable, though the filing fee to obtain the writ is waivable. Oh, those giddy days of the late sixties and early seventies (well before I went to law school), the prime of Miss Jean Boddie v. Connecticut, when the cost of public access to the courts was still a matter of intense judicial concern!

P.S.: with replevin, as with the prejudgment attachment I did a few years ago, I walked out of the courthouse with the original signed writ in my briefcase. Which is a very strange feeling after twenty years of vigilance to make sure that I don't accidentally walk out of the courthouse with an original order.

cute, very cute

The scene: downtown Seattle, 3:30 p.m. Friday. I am hurtling down 2nd Avenue towards the inception of I-90 to get to my daughter's dance class in Bellevue before it is over.

The sighting: an inexpensive-model BMW in the lane next to mine with vanity plates that say "JEDIESQ"("Jedi, Esq." with punctuation--cute, very cute).

I blink in disbelief, because I think advertising that your car is a lawyer's car is a fine way to get yourself keyed in the parking lot--myself, I drive what looks like an unmarked WSP vehicle--and further observe that the vanity plate has a custom frame that says "Your FORCE for social justice" and www.lawgrp.com.

I discovered later that the website offers "highly experienced litigators" but the firm, as far as I can see, consists of one lawyer, albeit with a nice car.

But I wonder--is it more egocentric to call yourself a "Jedi" on your vanity license plate or a "Goddess" on your vanity blog? Well, there's a good argument that at least in theory you are promoting yourself to a wider audience with a blog than with a vanity plate, even in Seattle at rush hour. As a practical matter, however, because as far as I know I have only two readers (my mom won't even read this), my friend the Jedi is getting a wider audience for his harmless fantasies than I am for mine.

The ultimate level of egocentricity, though, is probably better measured by grandiosity of the self-characterization not the number of people exposed to the fantasy. So I guess that makes me the blowhard here.

jedi update 11-23-2002

One of my newer readers (I think the count is up to six now) is a friend of Jedi, Esq. and assures me that he actually is a highly experienced litigator, and a very good one, too. He apparently uses that moniker a lot. I stand by my point that it's a dumb idea, given our society's general view of lawyers, to put anything with "Esq." on it anywhere near your physical car.

I personally, however, would sign up in a flash for plates that said "804(B)(3)" if I could get the sovereign state of Washington to issue parentheses. It's the perfect inside joke for 'gators, like the plate saying "LIC UNK" I saw on a pickup down at the courthouse that has to belong to a badge. Parentheses, however, appear to beyond the power of our state to control.